After our arrival in the Bocas del Toro archipelago on Wednesday, 29 May 2024 and getting settled in the Red Frog Beach Island Marina, the following days were a whirlwind of booking flights and hotels to Ireland and getting Paw Paw cleaned as best we could with the limited time we had; she was absolutely filthy from all the Bonaire red dust. Everything we looked at needed to be cleaned. Mother Nature assisted, though, with nice long steady rain showers from time to time. As we progressed with the cleaning activities we simultaneously started the tasks required to leave Paw Paw unattended. Elaine also got everything ready to be packed, a challenge in itself because we were only taking hand luggage for a 6 week trip and half a suitcase was already taken up with Elaine’s daily, weekly and just-in-case medications alone.

By Saturday, 1 June 2024, we received the news that Elaine’s dad had been transferred to the nursing home in one of the little towns, Castlewellan, about a 10 minute drive from Newcastle, where he would be receiving palliative care, a reality we all expected, but it was still difficult to have confirmed. Additionally, it wasn’t the ideal location for Elaine’s mom to visit, by there is a bus service and he seemed to settle in nicely, even being taken to join the other residents in his wheelchair.

For us, it was a race against his destiny though; trying to get to Ireland to see him while he was still this side of the grass. At the time of initially writing this article that outcome was still to be determined, exacerbated by delays in our travel plans.

However, before we even left Bocas del Toro, we had to deal with “operation suitcases”. Taking only carry-on luggage because some of our flights were planned to use Keenan’s standby benefits, a decision that later backfired, when we pulled the two suitable suitcases out of the port forepeak cabin, one suitcase was in perfect working order, while it’s identical twin didn’t have one zip that worked; they were all seized in the closed position. After trying everything to release them, Roy got to work on one, a zip on an outside pocket that looked the least crusted. Getting that to eventually move allowed Elaine to cut the inner lining and pack the suitcase from there, since trying to find another one in Bocas town at the 11th hour was something neither of us felt like dealing with.

It had been a hectic few days of getting the laundry done, cleaning inside and out, including getting all the cockpit cushions washed and dried in the glorious sunshine, removing all the safety gear from the lifelines, removing the jacklines, stowing everything from the cockpit below deck, giving the engines a freshwater flush, pickling the watermaker and Roy having to return to Immigration in Bocas town, using the resort’s complementary water taxi, because the officer had forgotten to take a particular form from us. Getting back to the resort was a little more challenging however. Not wanting to wait a few hours for the resort’s return complementary water taxi, he’d left his wallet on Paw Paw. Fortunately a local water taxi was happy to bring him back to the marina’s public dock, where Elaine met them to pay the fare.

By lunchtime on Sunday, 2 June 2024, with the water taxi booked for pickup at 0900 the following morning, Paw Paw cleaned and ready to be left unattended, our suitcases packed and the scheduled viewing of Paw Paw with potential buyers on Sunday afternoon, the only outstanding activity, we enjoyed some much needed R&R at the private La Rosa Beach Club, which included lunch and a few cold beverages at  the poolside café, but not before Roy enjoyed another early morning walk, while Elaine prepared a cooked breakfast, including freshly baked soda bread, leaving us with a minimal excess of fresh produce, which Roy subsequently gave to the laundry lady, much to her delight. Although our cleaning efforts ended up being more work than we originally intended because of the unexpected viewing schedule for Sunday afternoon, thankfully enquiries continued to flow in on our private advertising efforts, since our yacht broker was proving to be completely useless.

Fortunately packing our rather small hand luggage suitcases with at least a week’s worth of clothing was a breeze after Roy found an ingenious method online; best demonstrated in a video we’ll post at a later date, but a few photographs provide the gist.

On Saturday, 1 June 2024, before getting through all our activities, the gentle sound of rain tapping on Paw Paw’s deck woke us just before sunrise. Given the lovely cool temperature, we decided on an early morning walk, separating at one of the pathway junctions, where Elaine then walked to the Beach Club in the coolness of the rainforest canopy, listening to a variety of birds chirping happily while looking for sloths. Although she didn’t have any luck with that, she did encounter a friendly dog which seemed to have gone walkabout without his owner, but provided some entertainment as he was a real character. She also noticed that the local population seemed to be more indigenous  Indian and were very friendly and jolly, with most walking while listening to music.

By the time Elaine reached the Beach Club, Roy arrived minutes later, having taken the forest trail. After snooping around, he continued on his walk and Elaine returned to the marina, where she met two of the cruising ladies on the dock, enjoyed a chat and received a bit more information we needed; how to get spares and parts sourced and delivered, activities in the area and a little history on their sailing adventures. As it transpires, S/Y Tribe, which Elaine and Roy had both recognised from our travels, but couldn’t quite place, was indeed the same yacht we’d seen throughout the Caribbean and the South Pacific, as we were all sailing in these waters at the same time over the past ten years. Yogi had recognised Paw Paw too. Crazy ol’ world!

On Monday, 3 June 2024, we were up early for the long journey ahead of us to Ireland, one that was going to involve a first for Elaine; wheelchair assistance. She unfortunately had no choice, but to set her pride aside, given the torturous experience air travel had become for her, particularly the endless standing in mile long queues.

A swift water taxi transfer, followed by a land taxi, got us to the local airport minutes before the heavens opened and it absolutely bucketed down, with thunder and lightning booming through the airport. Needless to say, this was the start of our delays, but, since we were staying over in Panama City, it didn’t present any problems, although the pilot was clearly a wannabe Formula One race car driver, given the speeds at which he taxied around the airport after landing in the bad weather. Being bumped off the flight to Atlanta the following day, however, did present a major issue, resulting in us having to spend a small fortune to book positive space on all our remaining flights to Dublin in lieu of our preferred choice of flying standby. What we determined is that, although, there were seats available on the flight to Atlanta, generally these cannot be occupied because of weight and payload limitations on these flights; seemingly a regular issue associated with the weight of a good percentage of the passengers using this route. To be honest, we’d never seen such a collection of massively obese people in all our travels. Regardless, we wouldn’t be flying standby any time soon and returned to the hotel with tickets booked for the following day, the delay exacerbated by all the airline booking systems advertising flights at ~$1000USD each, but then increasing to ~$6000USD the minute we went to pay online. This happened with just about every online booking system until we eventually got tickets directly through Delta Airlines for the bargain basement rate of $3000USD for oneway tickets only to Dublin via Atlanta and New York, arriving Friday morning, 7 June 2024, after a stopover in yet another hotel in Atlanta.  We’d decided to deal with our return travel arrangements at a later date. The immediate urgency was getting to Dublin and onwards to Newcastle and Castlewellan. All in all, though, it was yet another one of our classic travel clusters. At this point, we were both utterly exhausted and Elaine ached all over after sitting on hard seats all day for nothing; she could have cried when they told us we weren’t getting on the flight.

To add insult to injury, the wheelchair ordered for Elaine didn’t show up, we hadn’t eaten since breakfast and, since we were corralled into a closed off section of the airport after a second security screening, we had no access to food, drinks or toilets for hours!

By now Elaine was crystal clear on one thing; she absolutely hated flying and, once we’re living in Ireland, she doesn’t plan on ever going anywhere near another airport again in her life! All she longs for now is a comfy little house, with a nice view and to go on little day trips or midweek breaks in our car whenever we feel like it. In fact, she doesn’t believe she’ll even leave the island of Ireland, except to go out to the little islands on the west coast!

On the bright side, however, we managed to find a hotel room for the night in Panama City versus spending the night at the airport. It didn’t help matters, though, that we would use four of our seven outfits each before even getting to Ireland, given our very small suitcases, because we thought we’d be flying standby. Guess laundry will be one of our first tasks after greeting and spending time with our loved ones.

That evening we booked our return tickets for the bargain basement price of $2000USD, with the hope that we won’t require an overnight hotel in Panama City, but rather actually catch our connecting flight to Bocas del Toro on the same day; guess time will tell!

Wednesday, 5 June 2024, was our Take Two on getting to Atlanta. With allocated seats and Elaine actually getting the wheelchair assistance previously booked this time, we progressed through Immigration and the first and second Security screenings without a hitch, jumping the long queues in the process. Things were looking up! Alas, something had to happen, right! Well, it must have looked completely ridiculous after Elaine was singled out for a third Security screening. With every other passenger, including Roy, looking on, Elaine was requested to stand up out of the wheelchair, patted down, had various parts of her body swabbed and her handbag searched, before being told to return to her wheelchair. We really couldn’t make this stuff up if we tried! What disempowered idiots exist in this world! There’s always a bright side, though. With seats allocated to us a few rows apart, at least neither of us had an oversized individual sitting next to us, a miracle actually, since at least a third of the flight consisted of obese passengers, and the person sitting next to Elaine wasn’t coughing and spluttering.

Thankfully, although we had to wait for a wheelchair on arrival in Atlanta, Elaine was very appreciative of this service, given the queues to move through Immigration and Customs and miles required to walk from one concourse to the next for two separate shuttle transfers to the hotel we’d booked for the night.

It was 2130 by the time we dropped off our luggage in our hotel room and sat down to dinner. At the risk of sounding like moaning old fools, the hotel reception and dining area didn’t resemble any of the photographs advertising this Raddison Hotel, but when our dinner arrived on plastic plates with plastic utensils and our drinks in plastic cups, it was clear we’d paid a lot of money for a very cheap establishment, never mind our dislike for all things plastic after witnessing first hand during our sailing adventures the devastation these products cause to the environment. Breakfast the next morning was a repeat performance, exacerbated by the very expensive price tag of $50USD each for a substandard, tasteless “healthy choice” meal. The laugh of it all was the sleeve on our plastic cup of a hot drink was made from recycled paper. The irony was definitely not lost on us!

The next morning our travel woes continued after we were dropped off by the shuttle bus on the northern side of the domestic terminal, but our gate was on the southern side and not a wheelchair service in sight. After walking past every conceivable airline’s wheelchair assistance service en route to the United Airline’s service, they informed us they didn’t have any wheelchairs. To avoid any further aggravation, Elaine decided to walk the rest of the way, albeit in discomfort. Some battles are just not worth the fight! Fortunately Elaine is capable of walking; it’s the standing in queues that cause the most problems for her, but we hate to think what happens to the unfortunate individual who can’t walk or hobble at all, especially when a simple solution exists; one wheelchair assistance pickup point for the entire airport at a convenient drop-off point, rather than separate ones for each airline at vast distances from any drop-off point.

Sadly, although Elaine is exhausted all over again at just writing about this, it seemed the travel gods were prepared to rain all over our parade every step of the way.

After landing at Newark Airport on time, we discovered we had to take a shuttle to a different terminal that would preclude us from having to go back through a security screening, but the wheelchair assistance would stop at the bus stop. No problem - right! Well, after getting the shuttle and climbing the set of stairs at the drop-off point to enter our destination terminal, we discovered we’d been directed to the wrong terminal. That resulted in us having to walk all the way to the correct terminal, check in again, although we had no suitcases, since these were checked all the way through to Dublin from Atlanta and then clearing security again. The final straw was an idiot sending Elaine flying after tripping her with his suitcase and then receiving two different messages that our suitcases have been unloaded for collection in Newark and another indicating that they were checked through to Dublin. By this stage Elaine felt like sitting down and crying and not moving one more step until someone carried her to Dublin. She was so tired and ached all over, never mind her foul mood, while poor Roy tried to get a wheelchair for her and unravel the mystery with our luggage after being questioned at the check-in counter about our three bags. When Roy indicated that we only had two bags checked in at Atlanta through to Dublin, a chain of events were set in motion, resulting in finding two bags; one ours and one a mystery bag. Further investigations recovered our correct second suitcase, but not before the mysterious disappearance of the third bag, which appeared to have been offloaded in Atlanta. Regardless, thankfully our luggage was found and bound for Dublin as planned and the wheelchair arrived, precluding Elaine from having to face the longest security screening queue ever. The travel gods had finally taken pity on us and our guardian angels were watching over us after all, especially after learning that the flight had been overbooked and people were being bumped off the plane.

To say we were relieved when we eventually arrived on the redeye flight into Dublin that landed at around 0500 on Friday, 7 June 3024, with our luggage in tow, would be an understatement indeed.

Wheelchair assistance dropped us at the closest coffee shop, where we refuelled on caffeine and sugar and waited for the bus into Dublin city centre to collect our hired car, this time a Hyundai Kona electric vehicle, having decided to explore what one gets for the money at the cheaper end of the electric car spectrum or rather what one doesn’t get for the price.

Thankfully our drive to Newcastle was uneventful and after initial greetings, an afternoon nap and a phone call to the nursing home facility to ensure no infectious diseases were circulating, we were ready for the drive to the nursing home to visit Elaine’s dad; he was still this side of the grass and recognised us both immediately as soon as we walked into his private room, even though Elaine was donned with mask, visor and gloves, a precaution recommended by the manager of the facility to be sure, to be sure. Prayers had been answered once again!

While it was heartbreaking to see him in such a frail state, we had a lovely wee chat. The visit, although not long, included Roy popping out to get him a coffee and doughnut which he happily consumed after first eating a banana. Fitting a café-style net curtain, which Elaine’s mom had bought to furnish the room a bit more together with a nice colourful mat, moving his new clock to a different wall so he could see it properly, placing some nicknacks from home around the room and moving the wall paintings around, followed by the staff moving the bedroom furniture around the following day to allow Elaine’s dad to see the television properly and enjoy the garden views from his window made the room far less sterile. It wasn’t home, but Elaine’s dad was comfortable and was receiving the best care possible from wonderful, caring staff; the most we could ask for at this stage.

Our second visit involved a wee singalong, surprising us all to hear Elaine’s dad singing and remembering all the words to his favourite songs, some definitely bringing a tear to our eyes as we recalled the wonderful memories associated with many of the songs he sang over the years, a time when his life was full of vitality. Regardless, while heartbreaking, we had a lovely evening together and he loved it, recalling, of all things, the times he danced with Elaine’s mom in Mozambique and Zambia and saying it was like old times at the Buurendal Hotel in Newcastle on a Sunday night. It was indeed a night to remember under the worst of circumstances.

By 11 June 2024, we received more bad news when the on duty nursing staff member informed Elaine and her mom that Elaine’s dad was getting weaker by the day and that they needed to know “his wishes”. This was in preparation for the upcoming review, required to make him a permanent resident of the Lodge. The latter was, in many ways, a significant day; the Lodge staff were brought up to date on Elaine’s dad’s medical history and what events preceded and succeeded his latest episode that ended in him coming to the Lodge,  we were informed the palliative care team would now attend to him, his slight grievance of being very uncomfortable about interacting with the other residents suffering from Alzheimers and Dementia resulted in him being taken to a different common area during those times when he was able, and indeed, wanted to socialise, his detailed care was reviewed, which included all his nursing care ie administering tablets, checking vitals, checking his blood sugar levels, etc, and he would now receive a stronger and more regular dose of pain medication. It was reiterated that he would not be transferred to a hospital to help prolong his life in any way, except if he had a fall and broke a bone, for instance.

The review also involved a visit from his local doctor to explain and sign off on all the paperwork, agreeing to his future care, wishes and monies to be paid. It was receiving the news that the doctors had estimated his remaining life expectancy to be 3-4 weeks after being discharged from hospital, that was the enormous shock to us all, especially since half that time had already passed by the time we were notified. It didn’t take long for Elaine’s dad to figure out something was wrong with the situation he found himself in and that we were hiding something from him, culminating in Elaine’s dad asking her mom whether or not he was “ever getting out of this place”. After a family “conflab”, we made the decision to tell him, if and only if, he brought up the subject again, a bridge that was crossed a few days later, leaving us all devastated and sending Elaine’s mom into a tailspin.

It was clear he enjoyed our visits and was always pleased to see us when we arrived, but it was also abundantly clear that he missed Elaine’s mom terribly, constantly asking for her and wanting to know where she was, adding another dimension to our heartache. We always knew he never wanted to be in a nursing home, but this choice was taken away after this latest health incident which left him bedridden and requiring constant nursing care, something we all agreed as a family was impossible to accommodate at home. This fact, however, placed an enormous burden on Elaine’s mom, who eventually buckled under the strain. Seeing such a strong woman fall to pieces, was devastating to witness, but crystallised the need for us to focus on both Elaine’s parents, not just her dad. Thankfully, getting her feelings out in the open, rather than trying to be strong for the rest of us, helped tremendously, strangely enough, and having Dean, her eldest grandson, stay with her overnight during his short visit was a godsend.

With each passing day we had absolutely no idea what to expect on our visits, alarming us with the sudden and drastic changes from one day to the next, but we agreed to split the visits between us all to give him something to look forward to throughout his day and, given that his anxiety and confusion levels seemed to increase when time between visits were extended for unforeseen circumstances, especially confusion about the fact that he couldn’t get out of bed to “get ready for the day”. To avoid this as much as possible, visits usually involved Elaine and Roy visiting in the morning or afternoon outside mealtimes and depending on whether or not the staff took him down to the conservatory for activities and some social interaction with the other residents, all of which was dependent on his ability and willingness to participate on any given day. Evening visits were undertaken by Elaine’s mom and sister, although Elaine’s sister also alternated with our morning or afternoon visits and all visits were accompanied by whichever other family member was able to fly in for a few days to see him. Visits also included video calls with Elaine’s siblings in South Africa and Elaine reading special messages to him sent from family abroad and the grandchildren, all of which he acknowledged and loved receiving, bringing a smile to his face. We were all struggling, but doing our best to cherish every remaining moment we had with him, even on his bad days.

To manage our stress levels as best we could, besides enjoying walks on the waterfront or hiking up the Mourne Mountains, short outings for lunch were undertaken to Strangford, located on the shores of Strangford Lough and to Carlingford, stopping in at Rostrevor, a village lying at the foot of Slieve Martin on the coast of Carlingford Lough. On one of such outings which Elaine and Roy took on their own to County Monaghan, they specifically drove to see the village of Emyvale and view a few houses in the vicinity. Sadly this was a huge disappointment, but stumbling upon Glaslough was a wonderful surprise; a neat little village adjacent to the Castle Lesley Estate. We were so impressed we took Elaine’s mom and sister back to see the area a few weeks later and enjoy a delicious lunch at the estate, stopping in at Aughnacloy, on our return, a village in South Tyrone, where our great, great grandparents are from.

Back to our reality though, what started to amaze us, and certainly had us questioning the prognosis, was that Elaine’s dad was eating and drinking everything we brought him, from coffee to jam doughnuts, slices of cake, sausage rolls, croissants, bananas, pears, grapes, etc. He even wanted to know how he could get an invite to the dinners Roy was cooking for us all at home prior to the evening visits, resulting in small dinner portions being taken to him. We could even see his strength returning as he regained his ability to move himself in his bed. Things simply didn’t add up. There were times when he had finished eating everything we had brought him and he’d then say: “So now what?”, our cue to put on the music to enjoy a little singalong and a dance.

Regardless, as we all valued our time with him, we knew this was his final journey and it was important to have his loved ones beside him every step of the way. As far as we were concerned his emotional state was far more important than his physical state at this juncture and, with all things considered, we endeavoured to have very calm, tranquil and peaceful visits under awful circumstances.

By Sunday, 23 June 2024, it was time for another airport, another delayed flight, another country; we were heading back to Türkiye for all Elaine’s medical treatments, including cataract surgery, both of us having a full dermatological checkup and seeing a rheumatologist for the first time since leaving Türkiye early last year, the latter an unavoidable situation, given our difficulty in securing the services of a rheumatologist in other parts of the world we’ve visited during the intervening months. It had become abundantly clear to us, however, that all we seemed to be doing lately was ping-ponging between the world’s two largest cul-de-sacs. We never thought in a million years we’d be back in Antalya, but Türkiye was the only country we could find the medical care we needed; a rather sad indictment of the western world’s healthcare systems.

On the afternoon of Monday, 24 June 2024, after an initial wander through the Old Town, Kaleiçi, we were both in desperate need of an afternoon nap; everything seemed to catch up with us all at once.

The following days were spent in various hospitals around the city, commencing with Dünyagöz Hastanesi for Elaine’s cataract surgery. This involved a full day of tests, including an eye examination to determine what lens would be needed, ensuring the health of her eye for surgery through an OCT scan and a topography scan, followed by tests to ensure her body was healthy enough for the surgery because of her existing health conditions, including an EKG, blood tests and seeing the anaesthetist to ensure no complications arose with sedation.

By midday on Wednesday, 26 June 2024, it was all over and what a professional, proficient and caring experience it was. The cherry on the cake came the following morning during her post-op checkup after the eye patch was removed; a whole new world had opened up, emphasising just how blind Elaine was prior to the surgery. She was ecstatic!

That Thursday involved a visit to the largest hospital either of us had ever visited, the public Akdeniz Üniversitesi Hastanesi, the second largest in Türkiye, where Elaine received a consultation from the rheumatologist, followed by our dermatology appointments on Friday at the private Memorial Hastanesi, the latter a complete contrast to our experience the previous day; money talks no matter where in the world one finds oneself, but, given that Elaine’s rheumatologist was no longer practicing at the Memorial, we had no choice. The rheumatology visit, however, re-emphasised our need to get Paw Paw sold and get settled in Ireland in order for Elaine to receive consistent and updated biological treatments, a message that had previously been relayed to her last February. The last medical activity for the week was collecting all our prescription medications sourced by a local pharmacy for us. All in all, it was a very successful week, although Elaine felt like a pin cushion with bruises on both arms, but it was actually a sad indictment of the health care systems in all the western countries we are citizens of. After numerous attempts, we simply couldn’t get the services we needed without dealing with the horrendous waiting lists or, indeed, paying a fortune to avail ourselves of the private services. Our total cost, including our flights and accommodation in Türkiye was a fraction of the cost we would have incurred for cataract surgery on just one eye. Shameful really!

Our visit fortunately wasn’t all medically related, though, providing time to visit a few old favourite establishments located within walking distance of the boutique hotel we’d chosen for this visit, Hotel 1207. These included Sudd Coffee café for their decadent chocolate doughnuts, some of our favourite restaurants, including Luna and Vanilla and doing a bit of shopping to replenish Elaine’s light summer trousers and Roy’s polo shirts. We also discovered a few new restaurants and areas of Kaleiçi we hadn’t stumbled upon before, including the Cava restaurant and the Patron Boutique hotel, both of which had lovely gardens and secluded walled patios with a wonderful ambiance to while away an evening over a delicious meal. Pre-dinner drinks were also enjoyed at one of the many watering holes along the waterfront near the Old Town Harbour. Of course it didn’t take long to be reminded of the calls-to-pray from the various mosques surrounding the hotel.

While this entire trip was necessary on numerous fronts, the adhoc nature of our travel arrangements compromised Elaine’s health extensively, particularly the visits to the numerous hospitals, the congestion at the airports, as well as on the fully booked flights and while out and about amongst throngs of people, particularly the numerous little “germ bags” accompanying their parents on the family summer holiday; we simply couldn’t have travelled at a worse possible time of the year. All we could do to minimise the potential impact was to keep our masks firmly glued to our faces, particularly Elaine, keep our hands sanitised, refrain from eating or drink anything when in close quarters, avoid visits to the public toilets as much as possible and pray.

By Sunday, 30 June 2024, we were back in Ireland, albeit that our return flight was slightly delayed; an improvement on previous endeavours however, for which we were very grateful!

The bus ride from the airport into Dublin city centre to collect our hire car was definitely slower than previous trips though; not surprising after realising that “Swifties” from all over Ireland and further afield had descended on Dublin for the Taylor Swift concert. This together with road works and diversions on our trip back to Northern Ireland as we transited through South Down, changed our original plans to visit Elaine’s dad after dropping all our luggage back in Newcastle, getting unpacked, getting the laundry done and getting something to eat. Instead we headed straight to the Lodge and enjoyed another fun visit with a few laughs and jokes. It was a relief to find Elaine’s dad looking contented, relaxed and comfortable. Sadly this was to be one of our last more enjoyable visits.